Guess what else doesn't work without electricity? The garage door, which blocked us from getting to our stupid SNOW BLOWER. You would THINK the builders of that garage would have also put in a SIDE DOOR that we could open, but noooooo, there is no such thing. Just the main garage door. So, armed only with one small shovel, the three of us, (Pete, his son Nathan, and I) took turns shoveling ourselves out...ten hours later, we all collapsed from exhaustion. Since then I've been battling a bad cold, and cursing this winter weather with a vengeance. We can't even get our own cars up this stupid drive way!! I mean, hey, I like driving a Mercedes around, but in a snow storm, it becomes just a stupid slippery tin can with wheels.
Anyway, it's been a fun time full of shits and giggles around here, lemme tell ya.
I'm in the process of getting my mom a plane ticket, which was upon Florence's insistence, (and she's paying for it), because she misses her a lot and wants her to come back. Isn't that SWEET?! They really hit it off very well over Christmas, so what the hell, might as well bring her back in March and let her see the pretty flowers that will bloom in our yard this spring. I'm going to be driving back to Michigan in April, to try on my wedding dress, so she can go back with me then and return in July for the wedding, or just stay here until the end of July.
We're still searching for a bigger house too. We took another tour, (our third so far), of the DREAM HOUSE...and dammit-to-hell, I STILL WANT IT....but we also looked at several others. I'm sorry, but I get so bored to death with the same old looking houses, those icky colonial style ones just make me cringe with terror when I think of the monotonous mediocrity that goes with them. I just can't stand it. The DREAM HOUSE is UNIQUE!! That's partially why I love it so much. It has an awesome "wow" factor that blows me away. It even blew away the realtor who came with us. Now she understands why I'm so obsessed with it.
There was one farm house, quite old, and in need of some major work...but the acreage was nice, and it's on a cul-de-sac, so it's nice and quiet and private, just the way I like it...and out of the houses we've seen so far, Pete said that was his favorite. It has a lot of character, and I like that too. If we put in a brand new kitchen and re-modeled the bathrooms, it would be a very nice place. Nevermind the wallpaper that is on the CEILINGS of each bedroom upstairs...why the HELL would anybody put WALLPAPER on a CEILING?!! And the hideous wallpaper in the dining room has GOT to go. Not to mention the awful ORANGE SHAG CARPET everywhere that covers hard wood floors...rip that nasty shit right outta there, and I'd be happy. Other than THAT, it's a pretty decent place overall. But the DREAM HOUSE needs NOTHING to be done to it!! Everything is BRAND NEW!! No maintenance at ALL!! Just some painting maybe. Ah well, Pete is not convinced about the dream house, and he's stubborn as a friggin' mule. He'd rather sadistically watch me remove wallpaper from ceilings apparently. (insert expletive here).
Anyway, let's see, what else has been happening around here...hmmm...I'm just waiting for the roof to collapse in around us, the snow is so deep and heavy on it...some of the trees around us have either snapped in half, or are bent so low they will snap at any moment. It's really bizarre. I mean, I'm from Michigan and I've NEVER seen this kind of mess in the winter. Nobody here knows how the hell to DRIVE in it either, except ME. (Turn IN to the skid!!) How hard is that?
I've done a 360 on the highway going 75 miles an hour in Michigan, and just kept right on going! People who see you doing a 360 in front of them just move to the far lanes and let you zoom right by until you straighten yourself out. No big whoop. But oh noooo, not HERE...I have seen people driving straight into a snow bank, and then they have no shovel or anything in their car trunks, like a bunch of morons. Dumbasses everywhere. I was laughing when I saw that my Museum in DC was CLOSED for a whole WEEK!! That NEVER happens!! Nobody knows how to drive in DC in winter, either. I keep saying the terrorists just need to buy a snow making machine, dump a shitload of the white stuff on DC, walk right in, and take over. No weapons of mass destruction needed. But hey, who am I? I'm just a non-terrorist schlub.
Anyway, so I've come up with this FANTASTIC NEW INVENTION!! Yes, I think of all sorts of inventions, (like, why can't they add a damned HANDLE to a Ziploc baggie? Is that too much to ask? I don't like the brown bags that you put Ziplocs inside, becuase they have no HANDLES). So just make some damned brown bags AND Ziplocs, both with handles, so nobody has to drop their lunch on the train or bus, or in the parking lot on their way to work for Pete's sake!!
But I digress.
This new handy dandy invention would be for women of very low arm strength, (like ME), who absolutely LOATHES shoveling snow. Why not get one of those weed wacker handles, a nice lightweight one, with two handles to hold onto, and at the end of it, just put some of that coiled RADIANT HEAT with a large FLAT TILE over it, (like the fancy floors that I love in bathrooms), and PUSH THE HEAT into a snowbank, to MELT THAT CRAP, instead of trying to LIFT it and toss it over your shoulders?? I mean COME ON!! That can't be TOO difficult to invent, could it?? I'm just sayin'. That could really be a money making thing around here. There ya go, you industrious readers of the blog, go out and make a million and patent it. Just remember where you GOT the idea, and send me some green. That's all I ask.
Ok, so yesterday was the dreaded Valentines Day. I've never had a boyfriend on that stupid holiday, so typically I would wait until the day AFTER and go buy some chocolates for myself that are on sale, half off. But, Pete gave me a nice card, and took me out for some Indian food. Silly me, I had to wear my red high heel shoes, a skirt, and a corset top of red and black, and I damned near froze my tootsies off. But dang it, I never get a chance to really dress up much anymore, and I kinda miss doing that. I wanted to go to the casino and win some bucks so we could buy that damned DREAM HOUSE, but noooo, Pete wouldn't hear of it. GRRRR. Other than that, we just putzed around the house most of the day. I took Pete's mom to church in the morning and then she and I went out for lunch, but Pete slept in late from working the night before, and I just let him crash most of the day. Poor guy works too much.
In other news....Our official wedding invitations are DONE, and ready to be mailed!! In fact, I was going to take them to the post office TODAY, until we realized it's a friggin' HOLIDAY and there's no mail service. Damned Presidents Day anyway.
Well, that's the scoop from our world of poop in this frozen tundra of Pittsburgh. Just call me Nanook of the North.
Love, Becky
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