They are both quite startled...
The man turns to her and says, 'Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me.'
She replies, 'If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221.'
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HA!! THAT CRACKED ME UP!!! hehehehehe
Anyway, I'm back from Ocean City, and my mom clogged up my email box with 50 jokes like this one...sheesh. Oh well, that one gave me a good guffaw at least.
Okay well, I've decided I'm going to spend the rest of my life living near the ocean, if it's the last thing I do. Yep, Pete's going to have to suck it up and either quit his job, or long-distance commute, that's all there is to it. I am determined.
I got burnt to a crisp sitting in the sun on the beach for nearly 2 hours, but I don't care, I'd do it all over again!! I ate too much----oh my GAWD, there was this place that had an all-you-can-eat buffet with prime rib, salmon, crab legs, shrimp, seafood salad, roasted turkey, Maryland crab soup, seafood bisque, sweet potato casserole with marshmallows, a huge salad bar, and a huge dessert bar......I went back THREE TIMES, what a PIG!!! hehehehe But ya know what, dammit, I was on VACATION, so I don't really give a crap. I had 2 plates of crab legs and shrimp, with a piece of salmon, and one heaping plate of prime rib, with one slice of turkey, some soup, salad and the sweet potatoes, and pecan pie for dessert. The waiter came by and asked if he could get us anything else, and I said, "Yes Sir, howz about a wheelbarrow to get us out to the car?!" hehehehe The guy laughed, but I was damned serious.
Then I discovered that Mike's Hard Lemonade has a RASPBERRY flavor now, and oh my GAWD was that YUMMY. So I bought a 6 pack of those, and drank a few....mmmm....(I am a lightweight don'tchaknow, so wine coolers are more my speed than anything else alcoholic)...and then we had ice cream, buffalo wings, onion rings, pizza, oh man oh man....I swear I've put on 30 pounds. But to hell with it, we walked all over the place the whole weekend, I figure that's good enough to even out the whole food binge part of it.
I FOUND THE COOLEST JOURNEY STUFF at the arts and crafts tents too----one woman creates PURSES out of old record album covers, and 45 record sleeves---so I got a Journey FRONTIERS large album purse, and a 45 of the rare Open Arms sleeve purse, they are AWESOME and very unique, so I am lovin' it. I realized after I bought them both for $75 bucks that I probably could have bought a ticket to see Journey in concert next time, but oh well...I got the purses and they are sweet, so I'm happy with them. I took a picture of her purse display and I've got her contact information too, so I'll post that info at some point soon. They had all kinds of different album covers as purses, AND she makes wallets too....holy crap I'm gonna go broke sending her all my Journey stuff to make into purses....LOL
Anyway, so that was the highlight of MY weekend, but the weather was gorgeous the whole time, I turned my toes blue in the numb freezing ocean water while I waded in and out finding seashells to bring home to Pete's mom, and I bought everybody some souvenir gifts that they opened last night when I got home. In fact, I bought too much stuff so I had to get a brand new duffel bag and check TWO bags onto the plane on the way home....they even made me go through airport security TWICE, because the first time they found my jar of Texas hot pickles that I wanted to bring home to Pete and his son Nate, they love hot spicy stuff like that, but the security guard said, "I'm sorry this jar is one ounce too heavy, and it's liquid, so you can't bring it on the plane." I stood there, looked at her and said, "If I eat one of these pickles, and I don't blow up, will that convince you that they are not explosive?" She shook her head no, and I had to go back out, open the jar, and dump out the juice before they'd let me go through security. How STUPID can you get?! I was highly peeved, but the pickles still tasted great, so I guess it all worked out. I mean, dammit, that jar of pickles cost me $7.50, I'm not going to toss 'em in the garbage!! No way!!
Ah well, the beach and the whole weekend was just awesome, and I wish I was still there...in fact, I found out last night when I got home that Pete's sister & brother-in-law happen to have a beach house (condo) in Avalon...I am not sure if that's in Connecticut or PA....but anyway, it's on the ocean, that's all that matters....so he's going to call them up and ask if we can rent it out for a week to have a nice vacation on the beach. I think that would be SWEET!!!
Well, it's back to the dreary grey rainy weather of Pittsburgh, what a bummer. I'm sunburned, but otherwise happy.
Hope everyone enjoyed Mother's Day!! Bye for now.
Love, Becky
No comments:
Post a Comment